1. INVITATION: Prayer begins with God's invitation for us to be in communion with the eternal Holy Spirit which is within us (see I Corinthians 6:19). Thus, we are invited or drawn to prayer. Prayer is God's initiative. We should be able to feel God's gentle tug. Read the words to the hymn "Sweet Hour of Prayer"2. ACCEPTANCE: There is a decisive moment when we either accept or reject God's invitation. In this regard, prayer is an intentional act, an act of the will to either be or not to be in communion with God's Spirit and will. There are, of course, times when we are but tacitly aware of God's drawing or calling us to prayer. There are other times when we instinctively or unintentionally find ourselves in prayer. Situations may arise in our lives wherein we spontaneously pray, "Lord, have mercy!" Here, however, we are addressing the conscious awareness of God's calling us to prayer, and our decision to accept or reject God's invitation. In this regard, acceptance follows invitation. When you have accepted, go to your "prayer closet," your special quiet place. Sit in a comfortable chair. Close your eyes and take a few deep relaxing breaths. Acknowledge to the Lord your acceptance.
3. QUIETING THE SOUL: Whether we accept God's invitation or not, still we have much on our hearts and minds. Therefore, we must go through a process of quieting the soul, or, bringing the soul to a state of rest.
a) First, chose a short scripture which will help you to bring your soul to rest. Howard Thurman called this "the centering moment." For example, "I will lift up my eyes to the hills," or, "The Lord is my strength and my salvation," or, "The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want." Special Note #1: As you grow in this experience of prayer, you will be able to allow the Spirit to give you a "spirited word" in prayer. More about this later.
b) As you enter into prayer, allow all the concerns of your heart and mind to pour themselves out onto an imaginary altar. Do not try to stop your mind from thinking or wandering, nor your heart from feeling. This is a necessary process. God's invitation is one which invites you to pour yourself out.
c) After a minute or so, recite your chosen scripture. This will help to you to refocus and slow down the pouring out of your soul. More importantly, reciting your scripture will help you avoid trying to "work out what you have poured out." Let God do the work. Page 2: Seven Steps to An Effective Prayer Life.
d) After a moment, the thoughts and feelings will begin again. Let them come. Again, after about a minute, recite your scripture. You may have to repeat this process several times until your "soul comes to a rest." The thoughts stop. You are quiet. You soul is at rest. In the words of Saint Augustine, "Lord, I cannot rest until my soul rests in you." Special Note #2: The first few times you try praying in this way you may find this process of quieting your soul extremely difficult. You can expect feelings of uneasiness and anxiety. After a few daily attempts, you will get better at it. The first few times, try it for about three to five minutes or so. Soon, you will master the ability to quiet you soul.
e) To this point you have not spoken a word! You have brought your soul to a state of rest so that you can feel the presence of God, and listen for and hear the voice of God.
4. FEELING GOD'S PRESENCE AND LISTENING FOR AND TO THE VOICE OF GOD: Once the soul has been quieted, you are now prepared to feel the presence of God, to listen, and hear the "still small" voice of God.
a) Feeling the Presence of God
i) The External Presence of God: At best, the presence of God can only be described, not explained. The presence of God is the awareness that there is something Holy around you. There will be times when you will actually feel the presence of the Holy Spirit come into your prayer place. It may scare you some. Distinctive, too, is the presence of the Christ. You will come to know the feel of His distinctive presence.
ii) The Internal Presence of God: Besides the experience of the "external presence of the Holy Spirit," there is also the internal experience of the Holy Spirit. Remember, the Holy Spirit lives within you. For me, I have found that the experience of the Holy Spirit in us is a bit more difficult to grasp. Perhaps it is not to be "grasped at all," but that we are to be grasped by it.
Let me caution you with this word. The mystics as well as our common sense ancestors knew that the closer we seek to be in communion with God, the greater the effort Satan (meaning the memories, experiences, and ill feelings of what the contemplative, Saint John of the Cross in his classic work, The Dark Night of the Soul, names as our “imperfections”) will make to disrupt our communion. In other words, the closer you seek to be in communion with God and to do God's will, you will also come to experience the presence of the power of evil in life and in your life. Evil and “Satan” also has its distinctive presence. It is at times subtle and yet destructive.
b) Listening for and to the Voice of God: What is the voice of God and how will you know it? The voice of God is known to you through your own authentic voice. Because the voice of God is to be known in your own authentic voice, it is critical that you be true to yourself; not in a state of denial, deception, or rationalization. This is why it is important that the soul has gone through a process of quieting and resting so that you can acknowledge and affirm the still small voice.
c) Remember the quieting process and the voice of God will discipline us. However, you will always experience the grace of God, the love of God, as well.
d) The voice that accuses (rightly or wrongly) but does not extend mercy, grace and forgiveness is not the voice of God. It is the voice of “Satan.”
e) What am I listening for? I have found that the "word," or "message of the Spirit" tends to be simple, short, and clear. It can be as short and simple as, "I love you more than you know," or, "Wait," or, a scripture that will need further discernment. There will also be times when there is "no word" as such, but rather a comforting presence, a sense of well being, assurance, or encouragement.
5. RESPONSE: You can expect some degree of struggle, tension, surrendering, and then being reconciled with what you experience, feel and hear. It may take a few efforts for you to begin to trust this new experience of prayer. It will not be easy. There is some purging and purifying of the soul to be done. You may experience something of yourself "dying;" that is, the release or freeing of something that had you bound. This happens as we come face to face with ourselves and with God. The struggle or the wrestling as Paul puts it, will also have to do with our contending with evil, and the Spirit's help with our deliverance. What is of utmost importance is that our struggle and our response always include an experience of the grace of God. Grace is accepting that you are accepted.
6. THANKSGIVING: It is only at this point that we speak; or give audible expression (other than the "groans of our spirit"). Our spirit, with the help of the Holy Spirit, has been speaking and groaning all the while. To this point, we have poured out ourselves, brought our soul to rest, felt for and listened to God. Now we are prepared to speak. I have found that the only things to say are words of praise and thanksgiving! All else has been expressed by the spirit! (Special Note #4: There are times when our prayer is a petition for ourselves or someone else in which case the prayer experience may be more traditional. Also, there are prayers called "arrows." These are quick petitions to God for things and people which come to mind. You may also give that person a call. Tell them that they were on your heart and that you prayed for them).
7. LIVING THE PROMISE IN FAITH: Continue to live with a tacit awareness of the presence of God in you and around you. "And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the age." Matthew 28:20.
Developed by Cedric Kirkland-Harris, Pastor Bank Street Memorial Baptist Church Norfolk, Virginia